Winning Strategies

How Full Is Your Bucket?

I once read a book named 'How Full is Your Bucket?' by Donald Clifton.    It talks about your need to fill your bucket in order to give away a part of yourself (your time, your energy, your love) to the ones in your family and in your influence.

It made so much sense to me, as a working mother, that as our bucket 'empties' we are unable to love our families and our children the way that we need to.  It is a matter of priorities.  We take the love that others have shown us to fill the bucket of our lives so that we can love others.  Sometimes we are giving away love and receiving none back in the process. 

It is a constant struggle as a parent, how do you keep the bucket full when it seems that we continually give away more than we receive.  I think the definition of motherhood is 'give away more love than you can ever possibly receive in return'.

The bucket can be filled by friends, family, or God, and needs to be replentished often.  There are phases of our life where replentishing the bucket is much harder than others.  It is at those times that we must fortify ourselves for the long marathon of parenthood and marriage. 

Figure out a way to fill your bucket.  Find a way to fill the bucket that will enable you to spread love on all those around you.  Sometimes I fail at this miserably.  Here's hoping that you do a better job of this than I often do.

A Life Intervention

Seated next to me on a recent flight was  a man, let's call him Joe (to protect his identity).  He was a consultant, flying off to 'rescue a client ' in distress.

He was anxious and hurried, frustrated that his life had, well, become a big ball of all work and no play.  His work life had overtaken his life, leaving him little time left to enjoy the life before him.

Joe's current state could describe you or I or any of us on any given day.  We begin to work on a project, work on advancing at the office and before we know it, work has consumed our days, our evenings, and all the spaces inbetween.

We have allowed work to consume us.  It has taken over, taken us hostage, and we are none the wiser.  We let it hold us as gunpoint, and we longingly wonder how to make it different.

There is a Way Out
The good news is that there is a way out and YOU are in complete control.  If you have found yourself in the same boat as Joe, then take note.  Working yourself to death and missing out on life's pleasures (time with your spouse, family, kids, or friends) is no way to go about living.  YOU are in control.  YOU manage your calendar.   YOU accept the assignments.  YOU set the timelines (or are not moving the timelines to a more realistic achievement date).

What Are You Afraid Of?
I hear often that you are afraid of losing your jobs.  Many of you are creating unhealthy situations that will proliferate into worse situations that, if not resolved, will create your demise at work.  Examples include ignoring your spouse until he/she leave you (that would create a problem for you); ignoring your health until you are hospitalized, and the list goes on and on.

It comes down to the fact that living a balanced life is not only BETTER for YOU, but it is BETTER for your employer!  I recently took a vacation for 2 weeks.  Many at my office (if they were truthful) would tell you that I was becoming a complete pain in the ###.  I needed a few days off, and my work relationships, work outputs, and work results will be better off because I did.  Not only that, but my marriage will benefit, and since I left the kids as home- they are probably happier as well.  Smile.  Fear is a motivator that only keeps you from doing what you should do.

GO Ahead and Try It
Go ahead and try it.  Schedule some workout time into your calendar.  Schedule a much needed vacation.  If you hate your job and are working yourself to death, schedule time to interview for another position.  Schedule a dinner date with your spouse or friends.  Take some time to equalize the amazing amount of work that you do.

I dare you.

Are You Safe? New Apps May Threaten Your Security

What if people knew EXACTLY where you were when you were out on the town.  That would be a little scarey, wouldn't it? Well, that is exactly what the app 'Girls Around Me' offers to any potential person that chooses to download it.

They can see where you've checked in and, in map formatted view, know EXACTLY where to find you.  I can't imagine that this is a safe way to 'hit the town'.  See article at

http://www.cultofmac.com/157641/this-creepy-app-isnt-just-stalking-women-without-their-knowledge-its-a-wake-up-call-about-facebook-privacy/?utm_campaign=spread-us?ref=linkedin

It gives the user everything they need to know about you.  Where you are, what you look like, your full name, and even what you like and don't like.  All a potential predator would have to do is go to your location, pretend to know you, mention key information about you from your facebook site, and potentially risk a threat to your security.

I agree with the writer of the article, and i quote, " This is an app you should download to teach the people you care about that privacy issues are real, that social networks like Facebook and Foursquare expose you and the ones you love, and that if you do not know exactly how much you are sharing, you are as easily preyed upon as if you were naked. I can think of no better way to get a person to realize that they should understand their Facebook privacy settings then pulling out this app."

Be careful ladies!  Danger lurking.

Are Your Biggest Earning Days Over? Not If You Don't Want Them to BE!

US News and World Report recently published an article quoting that , for women, we will stop receiving pay raises at about age 37 (and the age is 45 for men).  YUK.  YIKES.  That should grab your attention.  And, for what reason do they quote?  We reach a level where experience eventually stops improving our productivity:  http://money.usnews.com/money/personal-finance/articles/2012/03/28/are-your-biggest-earning-days-over

Does It HAVE to be that Way?

It doesn't HAVE to be that way.  By distinctly working to create expertise in areas that your peers in the industry or field that you are in have not- you can capitalize on knowledge that can keep your salary climbing for several more years.  Are you in healthcare?  Become brilliantly knowlegeable about Meangingful Use stages 1 and 2.  Become an expert on the HITECH act.  Learn about security.  Explore alternate models of healthcare in other countries.  We have a big dilemma to solve- try to increase your education to add innovation and creativity in a field that lacks it greatly.

Are you in retail, manufacturing or engineering?  There are ways in each of these fields  that you can expand your knowledge to move your organizations forward.  Consider a path explaining the steps necessary to expand your brand and increase your value in my recent book, Brand YOU.  

If we sit back and let our career paths build themselves, and we are unaware of our brand or how to best position and GROW our skillsets and knowledge, than the article will ring true, every time.  Our earnings will cap off and then they will proceed to decline for the remainder of our earning years.

Take CHARGE!

Take charge of your career path and journey.  Explore options to increase your expertise and specialties.  Find ways to 'stand out from the crowd' to maximize your worth to an organization and your ability to move them forward.  Companies crave true thought leaders and innovators.

YOU own the determining factors in whether this statistic will become your reality or whether it will be debunked because of your ability to uniquely position yourself to increase your earning potential when others can not. Go prove them wrong!

You've Hired the Talent- Next Dilemma- Can You Challenge Them?

You've hired new talent and they are at the office, working away.  Now for your next dilemma, can you challenge them?  Can you keep them interested in the position and allow them enough latitude to enjoy the journey?  Are they coming to work, working on mundane tasks while you hold back the best assignments because you aren't quite sure if they can do it?

Allow them to try.  Give them the assignments and let them prove themselves.  I get calls from around the globe, and even calls from my own city- but they all say the same thing, "Let me try.  Let me take a whack at it.  You will be surprised what I can do".

Why not?  Why not give them the baton and let them twirl for awhile?  I'm lucky, I'm in a great place with a boss and team that is succeeding at challenging me and pushing me to new heights.  Because of that, they know that I will stick with them and give them the best of my efforts and attention.  You'd be amazed at the amount of work you can get out of talented employees that are being challenged.  You will really be surprised by the results.  Challenge them or you will lose them to the next opportunity that comes along and you will be back to the drawing board, hiring again for the same position that you just trained someone for.  Give them a chance.  I'm begging you.

Changing the Game

 

 I watched MoneyBall last night.  It was an amazing story about changing the game of baseball, but has- I believe, a direct correlation to business.

It is hard to change the game.  Against a room or company full of 'this is how we've always done it' people- changing the game is a risk.  It is untried, untested, unknown , and simply put- IT IS SCARY to many.  It threatens jobs, threatens security, and risks the results they believe they can achieve with the status quo.

If you truly want to be a game changer, you will be up against a tidalwave of pressure pushing against you.  The crowds will push you towards familiarity and status quo.  The pressure will be to recind and just acknowledge defeat.  You will have an easier time if you give in and let the status quo survive.  But is it the best for your company?  Is it the best direction?  If you feel strongly about changing the game, then it is worth fighting for. 

Stand up for what you believe.  If you believe it is time to change the game.  Risk it- run after it, and achieve amazing results.  I'll 'GO FOR IT' with you.  Smile

 

Go Get 'Em!

 

I love random meetings where someone refers someone your way and whala, you are able to connect someone that you didn't know 2 minutes before to someone that could make an impact in their life.

All in all, we don't reach out when we need it.  We normally crawl into a hole.  We keep quiet.  We don't tell people what we need.  We don't express our needs and we DON'T ASK others to help.  Why?  I guess we don't want to be a bother.  But- - what if asking someone to help could possibly help them as well?  What if you make a connection and you eventually help them MORE than they help you?

Give yourself a little credit.  Reach out to those you know.  Ask for help.  Ask questions.  Be assertive. Go Get 'Em!  I believe you can. I'm awaiting news of your success.

When I Get Around To It!

 

Ever just think that you will do something 'When You Get Around To it?'  Yes, I've heard that SO MANY times in my travels around the globe and my interactions with people in varying locations, in an assortment of job positions, and even in different economic classes.  We all seem to have one commonality- we never FIND ENOUGH TIME to get to the things done THAT YOU WANT TO DO.

 We try, don't get me wrong- and we have the best intentions.  But, somehow, we just don't make time to schedule that family trip, call our loved ones, or take a moment out to chat with our children or someone at work that needs to be listened to.  We are rushed.  We are in a hurry.

I had so many plans of things that I was 'going to do' with Heather's dad (now deceased).  We had said many times that we would do something 'when we got around to it'.  How do you really know that the future you are delaying your today for will ever arrive?

Live for Today
You really don't know what tomorrow holds.  You really have only one chance to live today.  You have but one opportunity to LIVE IN THE MOMENT and seize it- grasping it to the fullest.  So, if you are reading this- there is a reason.  There is something on your 'WHEN I GET AROUND TO IT' list that you need to tackle RIGHT NOW.  Stop reading and DO IT NOW.

Ideas of DO IT NOW THINGS
1) Schedule that family vacation- if you have miles- search for a location you want to attend and CLICK the Submit button.  Book it!

2) If you don't have miles- look up package deals on expedia or kayak.  Find a package that fits you.

3) Book out a lunch time on your calendar for Spring Break- plan to have lunch with your kids or spouse.  Why not?

4) Plan a dinner/date night with your spouse.  Surprise them!

5) Book out a vacation week on your work calendar.  It will be more likely that you spend some time with the family if it is booked on your calendar.

SUMMARY
Life speeds by.  It quickens past us and before we know it, many of the plans we had have dissipated into the wind.  They no longer apply.

Make something happen today.  GET AROUND to SOMETHING that you haven't DONE- but SHOULD.   I encourage you to plan something special.

Live the Life You are Dreaming Of

I've spent loads of time coaching people and speaking on 'Living the Life You are Dreaming Of'.

Today, an amazing friend Mandi Gilstrap will be speaking to a group of kids in Oak Cliff for me. Due to an upcoming trade show in Vegas- and the way it landed between a Kentucky trip- it worked out schedule wise to fly straight from Kentucky and use this time to spend with my kids and husband. Part of living the life of your dreams is making and keeping priorities. So- I must apologize for not being there in person to motivate and encourage you to find your passions and seek out a great life.

I have sent with her some of my books, and I hope that they inspire and motivate you into action. She has my contact information. I value each and every one of you. I will personally speak to you if you have questions. I want to see you succeed- and YOU- are the key to that success. Believe it!

So go DREAM--PERSEVERE- ACHIEVE- and SUCCEED. Trust in yourself and go create the life you've always dreamed of- or better yet- dream a better dream and go create that life.

Again- I apologize that I am not there in person. I care about you.

Let Mandi motivate and inspire you to action. May God richly bless you.

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Start Something for a Boy or Girl Today

Ever thought that this may be a good time to start something?  Maybe a good time to start something BIG?  Ever considered becoming a BIG sister or BIG brother to a child that could use a little of your time and commitment?

Now may be the right time.  Watch these motivating stories online:  http://www.bbbs.org/site/c.9iILI3NGKhK6F/b.7932445/k.8399/Start_Something_Web_Series.htm

 

 

It's not about you.  It is not about the work waiting for you on your desk, or the LONG list of TO DO's that you feel that you HAVE to get done.  That all adds up to a pile of wood, hay, and stubble.  It all erodes away.  Relationships that you invest in are really the only thing that stands the test of time, and lasts beyond rust, age, and changing fashions.

If you're reading this, there is a reason.  If you are feeling a 'tug' to volunteer or donate, do it.  Life is about what YOU DO and what you DON'T DO, not about what you thought you'd get around to.

Create a legacy that changes the world around you.  Years ago when I started my online encouraging website and blog, my motto was simply 'Encouraging Women to Change the World'.  As I begin to get more male readers, I changed it to 'Encouraging YOU to Change the World'.   Fast forward several years, and I felt led to change it to 'Encouraging YOU to change YOUR World and the world around you'.  So many were doing for others and suffering in their own lives.  Changing the world, I think, starts with your own world.  Once that is in order, you can reach out and touch the lives of those around you.

I encourage you to REACH out,  and TOUCH a life.  Work to invest yourself in someone that could forever be changed as a result.  At this moment, I'm praying that God will select a very special girl to be a part of my life, and someone that I can grow with and get to know.  I'm excited at the possibilities. 

May God encourage you to start something!

For more information, find Big Brothers and Big Sisters organization online:  http://www.bbbs.org
It is not too late to begin.