Winning Strategies

Bring Thanksgiving into Christmas

The kids are home for Christmas break.  Yesterday I made my youngest watch 'It's a Wonderful Life'.  I love that movie.  How many times do we see the world through eyes that don't 'see', how many times do we judge our circumstances through minds that don't 'remember', and how many times do we allow ourselves to be sad when we have everything to be 'thankful' and satisfied for?  Too many times.  That is the answer.  Way too many times.

No matter where this holiday season finds you, take a moment to alter your perspective and appreciate the things that you don't 'see', the things you don't 'remember', and the things that you should be thankful for.

We have a way of remembering only the bad, and forgetting the good.  Make a concerted effort to focus on the things in your life that you have to be thankful for.

The list may be longer than you might think.  My list starts out like this:  electricity, toiletts, health, family, a roof over my head, a job, people that I love to work with, amazing friends, a great church home, beautiful children, car that runs, food to eat, parents that are still alive and doing well, neices and nephews, fun activities I get to engage in (writing books and speaking), an amazing husband, clothes, heat , flooring, ability to walk through the streets without walking through sewage, medical care, sunshine, trees, gorgeous grandchild, brother, and the list could go on and on and on.

Make your list! When everyone is scurrying around and preparing for Christmas, make a list of the things that you are thankful for.  In my mind, I can take myself back to the village in Africa that i wakled through.  I can see the hungry children, and the huts, I can smell the smells, and see the poverty.  I can feel the emotions of the people around me.  In my mind I can travel back to that small village in Africa and remind myself EXACTLY all the things we have to be thankful for. 

Bring Thanksgiving into your Christmas.  Remember your blessings.

 

Touching Your Creativity Mindset

I love to write.  It takes a certain 'mood'.  I have to find my creative 'space'.  One must be in a specific mental mindset  that allows creativity. 

I think the same is true of work.  We must have a moment to create...a moment to allow our creativity to rise to the surface...to see things from a different perspective and to find out-of-the box solutions to problems and operational issues that we've seen time and time again.  We need to suddenly see them anew.

We are losing the ability to be creative, to think outside the box, and truly make things different.  We rush to and fro busy with busy-work, keeping our creative minds at bay and not fulfilling our life's mission and passion.  Where is your creativity space?  What setting makes your creative juices flow?  When was the last time you tapped into that creativity of yours?

Make it a point to find your creative genious and think through and solve a problem that has been weighing you or your company down for WAY too LONG. 

Take time this week to let your creative juices flow.  Get in a mindset of

Life's Perspective

There are roughly 90,000 homeless people on any given night in Los Angeles, California. Yes, that is 90,000 people with no place to call home, no soft bed to drop into, and no cupboard full of food. There are about 15,000 homeless people on skid row alone with approximately one dying every day.

Do you recognize the blessings in your life or are you so caught up in the frantic pace of your life that you have forgotten how charmed your life is? Are you really looking at your life in perspective? You may be going through a tough time, but is it really THAT tough? You may be unhappy with the house you live in, the car you drive, or the job you have----but you have a house, a car, and a job---all blessings God has given you to enjoy.

Reflect on the many many blessings in your life. Recognize how amazing your life is and be thankful for it.
 

Can You Create Your Own Reality?

Today I received a question from the web site-, "Do you believe that you can create your own reality?  You seem to have done that."

Yes.  I do believe that we can create our own reality.  It is a combination of a few actionable steps that I will outline below:

• Dream it:  Creating your own reality entails knowing what you'd like your reality to be.  Create an idea, however audacious, that lays out what you'd like your reality to be.  Dream a position you'd like be in, a place you'd like to live, a hobby youd like to pursue, or anything that you'd like in your life that isn't there today or doesn't exist the way you'd like it to.
• Sketch it out:  Creating your own reality entails tiny steps that , when added it, equal big steps.  When I was a size 14, I had a tiny goal of losing 2-3 pounds a month.  I mapped out a gradual process that got me to my goal in 3 years.  Although it sounds like a long time, it was a sustainable plan that I could stick to.   Sketch out a plan to slowly move IN THE DIRECTION of your goals.
• Pinpoint the Steps:  Once you have a dream and the rough draft of one way that you could possibly arrive at your goal, begin plotting steps to get there.  I wanted to speak to large groups and mentor women both in person and via my website.  When I created the dream, I didn't have a web site.  At the time, not many people knew me and fewer still would have wanted to book me for a speaking engagement.  I plotted out the steps to creating a blog, a web site, and created my first speech (hoping someone would book me- and they did - smile).
• Affirm Your Accomplishments:  Each small step that you take in the direction that you want to go deserves a  celebration.  Buy yourself that new X that you've been wanting.  Take a loved one out to dinner.  Celebrate the baby steps that you accomplish.
• Picture the End Result and Act Accordingly:  If you want to be an instructor, begin gathering lesson plans and preparing lessons (even before you ARE an Instructor).  If you want to take a college class, buy a desk and begin researching classes.  ACT as though you are already taking a class.  Move forward.  Visualize yourself in the scene. 
• Staying Focused- Keep Your Eye on the Goal:  So- how do you stay focused?  I use a bi-annual report card.  Twice a year, once in April (during my vacation time) and once in November (during holiday slow downs) I grade myself on how I'm doing in moving forward on my dreams.  It is not about beating yourself up.  It is more about the Progress Report.  What could you do better?  What TACTICAL PLAN  can you create to start making little steps in the right direction?  S- M- A -L - L-  Steps come together to create vast movement across space and time.

We get overwhelmed because we live in a society that constantly bombards us with instant gratification and FAST results.  TRUE metamorphasis is a VERY gradual process that entails much time.  It took me over 3 years to transform my body into more what I wanted it to look like.  It took me 5 years to build a brand, a mentoring capability, get an audience for the motivational blog and to write 2 books.  Slow and steady progress is your goal.  As you move towards it, it will seem like you've accomplished SO MUCH, SO FAST to the others around you.  To you, it will happen so gradually, that it will be hard for you to recall what it was like before the transformation.

Go transform yourself.  You can create your own reality.  You can live the life you want to live.  It will take a daring spirit with perseverence to succeed. You can do it.  Chase after it.

 

An Incredible Day

Recently, the Dallas Business Journal recognized 50 women leaders in Dallas. I felt privileged to be considered amongst the amazing list of honorees.

Lisa Bormaster, quoted some of my advice for leaders:

We control our worlds, our work, and our destinies.

 • Don’t feel like you have to prove yourself all the time. Often we are too uptight and it shows. We feel like we have to go above and beyond just to be accepted. Quit trying so hard (I hear this all the time; apparently, this is one of my greatest weaknesses).

 • Learn to be less loyal. Often we are loyal to a fault. We put our company needs ahead of our own. It is one of our downfalls. In our ‘loyal to a fault’ stance, we end up making less money and watching out for the company first, ourselves second. This is not a good way to be.

 • Last of all- ALWAYS believe in yourself. You are amazing. Accept it and move forward.

For the over 1,000 people that showed up to the luncheon, thank you for your attendance.  I am grateful that you helped to affirm the women leaders of Dallas.  What an incredible day!

A big shout out to Pam Stoyanoff, and Laura Lycan- two other women honored at this luncheon (and both personal friends of mine).  Way to go ladies!

 

Heather Carter and Caleb Williams, two of my children joined me for this event as well as my amazing husband, Michael Williams. 
 
 

 

Are You Willing to Get Up, Stand Up, and Run After Your Dreams?

It takes effort, energy and participation to run after your dreams. I recently heard a statistic that out of work people are spending their time watching TV and sleeping in-- not exercising and following educational dreams as we might hope. Why is that? The battle to success and accomplishment starts in your head. You have to believe that you can get there.

Step 1: Believe
Without believing, we don't do the physical tasks necessary to catapult us into our dreams. If we can't believe and dream, how can we get others to believe in us? Our beliefs and ability to visualize ourselves succeeding is the first step to running after your dreams.

Step 2: Take Action
The next step is to take action. Simply put one foot in front of the other. Call someone and ask advice, someone who has 'arrived' where you'd like to go. If you are an amazing singer- the physical piece would maybe involve a tryout for American Idol, recording something at a studio, or singing at your church. Each of these 'physical steps' will not occur if you don't try- act- and DO!

If you are unhappy at your job and always wanted to work another position, then apply for other positions and seek some good mentors to help you along the path.

Step 3: Never Give Up
It will take several steps to get you where you want to go. Life is a journey. Never give up on your dreams. They will morph and change- but always move forward towards the direction that you want to go.

Success happens one step at a time. Start towards it today if you haven't already.  If you are marching towards it, continue to march ahead.

The Beauty All Around me

I'm up early to exercise outside. The birds chirp overhead, forming a beautiful symphony for me. I pass by new roses in bloom, they are the reddest of red. Iris are in bloom in one spot, brilliantly painted by nature in a white and vibrant purple.

The sun peeks up from the horizon beckoning a new day. It is breathless beauty that surrounds me. I walk soaking in the scenery and mentally preparing for a new day. What will we accomplish today? What will today hold?
Grab hold of the day in front of you and make it the best that it can be.

Bungalow View in Bora Bora

From the other side of my deck, I have a totally different view. It is calming- surrounded by nature that surpasses comprehension. I stare out at a peak on the main island as I read about Greg Mortenson's hike up K2. I'm reading his book- Three Cups of Tea (http://www.amazon.com/Three-Cups-Tea-Mission-Promote/dp/0143038257/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1271307958&sr=8-1)

Michael has gone for a run on the beach and I'm enjoying the silence of my little bungalow, still feeling a little ill. I am swept up in thoughts of my life's journey since the book came out and how much fun it has been (http://www.amazon.com/Winning-Strategies-Women-Bethany-Williams/dp/1929976445/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1271308048&sr=1-1). I am blessed beyond belief. I had set out on a journey to chase my dreams and am somewhat amazed that they have culminated. I speak so regularly on what people can achieve when they dream, plan and take steps in the right direction- but I'm not positive that I even completely believed it for myself.

It is so powerful to have time to sit and think. It is enlightening to take opportunities to evaluate your life and redirect the paths that are not going in the right direction.

So here I sit, staring out over the blue green waters of the island, transfixed in a dream with my eyes open. Here I am enjoying one of the most beautiful places on earth when not that long ago I struggled to feed my children as a single parent with not enough to go around. Today I'm pondering the road of life and where it takes you and where it doesn't. Where would you like the road of life to take you?

Walk a few steps in their shoes

There is an alarming number of single moms raising their children alone. Many of them are doing this without any kind of financial support. They are working, caring for their children and managing all of their responsibilities alone. Can you imagine what a day in their shoes feels like?

You probably work in a company, attend a church service or school where you know several of these single moms. They will never admit it, but the road is hard. Even if the finances work themselves out, there is an emotional drain that occurs when you are the main source of emotional support for your children. It is a hard and harrowing road. I'm asking each of you to consider doing something special for one of these single moms. Consider leaving her a gift card from anonymous. Think about leaving an encouraging note or a cooked dinner for her to take home. If she reports to you, consider give her an extra day off or two. (Same message for the single dads- it is rough no matter the gender). Invite a single parent to your house for a home cooked dinner (tell them to bring the kids).

These moms (and single dads) are raising the children that will run our schools, our government and our world. They are our future. We turn our heads and pretend that we don't really see them. We go through our days unknowingly refusing to admit to ourselves the dire struggles that they may be facing. Open up your eyes. Dare to see the truth hidden in their eyes. Dare to care.

I know my readers have hearts of gold. I know you are a caring bunch. Reach out and touch a life close to you.

Many of you know that I struggled as a single mom for years. One year, I got up on Christmas morning and headed to the tree. It was (another) very tight year financially. I hadn't been able to buy much at all for Heather. I was dreading Christmas morning. My neighbors had somehow broke into the house and filled my tree with presents. 'Santa' had visited my house. Someone made our morning!

I tear up thinking about how much hope I felt and how much resilience I received from that blessing. Bless someone around you this year. They will remember it always. Heather was four years old that Christmas- I'm talking to you today about an event that still moves me to tears that happened 18 years ago.

Go bless someone around you this season. It will change their perspective and have a positive impact on your life and theirs.

Encouragement- Shake it off and Step Up

It seems that daily we are hit with a new barrier, a new wall, some kind of new obstacle that comes in various shapes and sizes.  We encounter negative people and negative situations, financial events that don't go our way and life's standing obstacles.  Daily we work to overcome them and still maintain a positive attitude and enough positive energy to not only rise above, but to continue to encourage those around you.  I get a lesson plan every week that has words of wisdom that are encouraging and thought provoking.  Enjoy this little tidbit on shaking it off, and stepping up...to overcome lifes obstacles.

 

Ed Rowell tells this parable about a farmer whose old dog fell into a dry well. After assessing the situation, the farmer sympathized with the dog but decided that neither the dog nor the well was worth the trouble of saving. Instead he planned to bury the old dog in the well and put him out of his misery.

When the farmer began shoveling, initially the old dog panicked. But then it dawned on the mutt that every time a shovel load of dirt landed on his back he could shake it off and step up.

This he did blow after blow. "Shake it off and step up, shake it off and step up, shake it off and step up!" he repeated to encourage himself.

It wasn't long before the dog, battered and exhausted, stepped triumphantly over the wall of that well. What he thought would bury him actually benefited him -- all because of the way he handled his adversity.

 

-- from Ed Rowell in his book Go the Distance